After a few weeks in the market and over a million copies sold (for non-commercial use), "How To Know When It's Time To Shoot Up A School (And Other Places With School Children)" has become an interdimensional bestseller.

The novel was published by Amalgamated Publishing Group and it has been translated into 55 languages including German, French, Ottlerflorbu, Gorbugorbugorbu, and Reflephgepty.

The book details how to shoot up a school, or any place that has school children, by using chemical weapons and a variety of lethal weapons. The author of the book, who goes by the pseudonym Mr. S, says the methods are 99.9% effective but only after you have a couple practice runs.

He describes with great nuance how to create thousands of improvised weapons along with instructions on using them.

The methods described in the book range from the simplest to the most elaborate and include such things as: Mustard gas, napalm, ricin, pipe bombs, and nuclear bullets.

The author also makes an extensive description of the results of each killing method.

Signed copies, which have been randomly hidden among the billions of copies being sent across the universe, also contain bonus information, such as how to safely rape a decapitated head or make a dead body seem alive for hostage situations.